Be Direct About What You Need
Originally shared February 6, 2025 in the Naked Sunday Newsletter. Adapted for the journal.
How often do you actually say what you want?
Not hint at it.
Not dance around it.
Not wait for someone else to pick up on your energy and figure it out for you.
I had a coaching call this past week where this hit hard. She wasn’t being direct about what she needed. And in this case, it was about money.
She’s in a role where she gives a lot—her time, energy, and expertise. But no matter how much she poured into her work, she wasn’t getting the support she needed to function at her best.
Because she never asked for it.
Like so many people who lead, serve, and care for others, she felt guilty putting her needs on the table. She didn’t want to feel selfish. She didn’t want to make waves.
But here’s the truth: If you don’t say what you want, you don’t get what you need.
And the people who actually want to support you? They need you to be clear.
Here’s what happens when you start being direct:
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Some people won’t like it. They liked you better when you gave endlessly and asked for nothing. They were never interested in truly supporting you—only in what they could get from you. Let them go.
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The right people—the ones who actually value you—will be grateful. Your lack of clarity wasn’t just hurting you, it was making their lives harder. They weren’t ignoring you; they just didn’t know what you needed.
This is the shift.
If you want to stop feeling overlooked, unsupported, or drained, start saying what you want. Be clear. Be direct. Let the wrong people fall away and strengthen the connections that truly matter.
So, what is it you actually want? And are you willing to say it?
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Until next time…
Love. Every. Body.
